Two-ways interactions
by MissWingedLioness
Summary: Sebastian is a good butler, faithful, loyal. But everything falls apart when it comes to televisions. And Ciel is not amused. Or maybe he is. Humor/Crack/One-shot.


**Two-way interactions.**

 **I think… this is the most stupid thing I wrote until now. Well. Read at your own risk. XD**

Spring.

A perfect blue sky, flowers start to blossom again, everything is peaceful and pleasant. Everyone is in peace with his own self, working is less tiring, birds chirp happily and-

-"GET THE FUCKING WAY OUT OF MY GARDEN GRELL!"

-"Oh come on Ciel, I just came to visit Sebby! ~

-"DON'T CALL ME BY MY NAME YOU FOOL AND GO AWAY ALREADY! Sebastian! Kill this Shinigami now! I have to go and watch Britain's got Talent! I have no time to waste!"

This is when Sebastian tried to kill Grell and received an offer. Since Grell was very fond of TVs (way too much), he always tried to buy the new model and, that faithful day, before arguing with Sebastian and the brat, he had bought a new one. He didn't have his death scythe with him but he had a television. Who doesn't love that black, big box that reproduces little, animated images of humans, animals, plants, EVERYTHING! Oh yeah, such a good invention. And when you think you have seen enough, humans create new channels, new programs and what about those wonderful telenovelas that always change protagonists and country but always speak about desperate love stories that end with one or two dead lovers!

When Grell realized she had mused a little too much over her endless love for TVs, Sebastian had already kicked her butt far from the Phantomhive Mansion. Grell, however, was persistent and asked him if he wanted a television. A woman always have a plan. And she told him a particular thing that would definitely convince him… Come on, he couldn't refuse it! In fact, he didn't. He took that thing with him and spared Grell's life. Ciel was not pleased since he had ordered him to kill the Shinigami, he didn't know why his butler had decided to be merciful. The question was killing him. Did Sebastian love Grell? No, that couldn't be. But what if he did?

The only thing he could do, was to call Sebastian in his office as soon as possible.

x.X.x

Sebastian approached it. He tentatively licked it, then bit it gently. His bocchan grunted. He moved his tongue up and down its side, he closed his eyes and smelled it. It had no smell at all, how strange. Ciel was growing impatient. Since when Sebastian was so slow when it came to that kind of things? He had seen his butler seduce many humans, he usually was fast. But now, now he was so slow and Ciel really needed him to fasten his actions. He tugged his butler's beautiful black hair but it was to no use, Sebastian was too caught in what he was doing at the moment. Not that Ciel couldn't be pleased if his butler took his time and did things well but, hey… WHY WAS HE SUPPOSED TO TRY AND SEDUCE A TELEVISION?

The young boy angrily watched his butler while he was studying that object, licking, biting, smelling it and making stupid faces at it. What was the concern with it? They already had a TV inside the Mansion, Sebastian used to clean it and keep it serviceable and he did that for years. Maybe this one had something more. Maybe Grell had done something to it, after all Sebastian explained it was Grell's gift. Ciel started to think about it. Why would Sebastian accept a gift from that redheaded man? And overall, why he looked so attracted to it? He could only ask.

-"Sebastian, would you care to explain why you're trying to have sexual intercourse with a TV? I mean, it's not that you can't but… the fuck, it's just weird!"

-"Sorry bocchan, I'm not trying to seduce it, I'm just trying to understand where the souls are."

-"What souls?"

-"The ones hidden inside it. There are a lot of humans inside. Humans have souls. Where are those?"

The count started to laugh. Really? His handsome, powerful, ruthless butler was confused about that? He really thought souls were hidden inside TVs? No fucking way, he couldn't be so naif, he was a fucking badass demon! Ciel continued his "inquiry":

-"Who told you there are souls in there?"

-"Grell told me. That stupid Shinigami revealed his secret! Humans build TVs to preserve their souls and Shinigamis buy it in order to prevent them from being immortal. If I manage to sneak inside this thing I can eat some."

-"Oh."

-"What's wrong, young master?"

-"Sebastian, I believe it's moment I give you The Talk. You know the "All you can eat" restaurants?"

-"Yes, those places where humans eat until they feel stuffed and then start to roll like cucumbers."

-"… More or less. Okay, so, TV is not an "All you can eat" for demons. Humans don't hide their souls there and Grell convinced you otherwise in order to escape. It seems that Shinigami is sly after all. What surprises me is you actually believed him."

At that moment, a blush covered Sebastian's cheeks. When Ciel started to laugh, the blush grew bigger. And bigger. And bigger. That brat also shared the story with everyone he knew, of course. And Grell did the same. Sebastian was now sure of one thing. He would find Grell and make him pay. His bocchan was sure to follow.

Beautiful redheads are tricky. Fucking television tough, they could offer a better meal service after all.

 **Kathy's little, tiny, minuscule corner.**

 **Sorry. I had to write this. I mean, I wasn't forced to but it sounded funny to me. Maybe it isn't. Or yes? As always, reviews are always welcome, such as constructive criticism. Oh and, I was thinking that maybe, if someone feels like to, I could use a beta reader. Or if you want, I can beta-read for English, French, Spanish and Italian.**

 **If you're here I guess you red everything. Heh, thank you! And many kisses to you then! :D**

 **Katherine_Lionhearted**


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